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Captain Speedwei
Recap Rhyme 01/25/06

With the unveiling of the S4RS at the NYC Duc Store,
To the Motorcycle Show that was kind of a bore.

This January weekend was bike fun filled,
Even got my buzz on at the Duc Store with drinks that were chilled.

Saw CEO Michael Lock and said what the fock!

I looked around real HARD, but never spotted the Hypermotard!

A bunch of monsters also rolled up into town,
All challenging to see who gets the crown.

Many DESMO members displayed their beasts,
Like candy for the eyes, what a feast!

As Tony the Tiger says, they'rrrrrrrre all GREAT!
Our very own tiger trainer Mishell took 3rd place!

Congrats Mishell! You must be excited!
Hope you celebrated with your Monster and went out to ride it!

Man I was hoping to see that Hypermotard,
Instead I found another bike that got me real hard!

I couldn't leave that Aprilia Supermoto, it was sexy as hell,
Or was it just spokes model Amber and her sweet smell.

Either way I spent a lot of time in that booth seeing what else was new,
While Pinky was in the TPM truck trying on a Kangaroo!

Those new Motogp Kangaroo Leathers are pretty hip,
Avoid one of the 42s, while testing it out we accidentally heard a rip!

Good to see some of the DESMO faces this weekend.
Hope to go on a ride soon, just let me know when!


Happy Holidays 12/23/05

D to the E to the SMO,
Happy Holidays and HO HO HO!

Merry Christmas to all those who celebrate,
Hope you're done with your shopping and didn't procrastinate.

Cause tomorrow afternoon might hit 50,
No better reason to ride, usually the weather is shitty.

Go give your Ducatis some love,
Pull on that Arai and slap on those gloves.

Come Christmas Day it'll be time with the fam,
Getting fat from the full spread and the glazed ham.

Work is done & I'm outta here to go get drunk,
Find me a hottie to put my bike in her trunk.

Happy Holidays to everyone in the world,
Peace and love to all DESMO boys and girls!


Winterizing Rhyme 12/19/05

Woke up in the morning with the yearning for speed,
Not Sandra Bullock jumping that bus with Keanny Reeves.

Got a crazy hangover from the night before,
Said eff it, grabbed my helmet and popped the garage door.

Unclipped the tender and took the keys out my pocket,
Woke up Neo my Ducati crotch rocket.

My bike is badass when she's burning the gas,
Mess with us in the twisties, you get a foot in that ass

It was a great day for riding, no need for an electric vest,
Embrace that cold breeze hitting firmly on your chest.

No need to winterize your Italian steed,
'Cause days like yesterday are all they need!


DESMO Track Day Rap 04/21/05

The DESMO/BCM trackday, either rain or shine!
Sign up now, youíre guaranteed to have a great time!

Wait too long to register and youíll be shite out of luck.
Donít be THAT schmuck, itís only 2 hundred bucks!

Learn to ride well, learn to ride fast!
Learn to hang off your bike with one cheek of your ass!

The BCM instructors and crew are definitely top notch!
But abide by Susieís rules or sheíll kick you in the crotch!

Plan to stay over night at the RED ROOF INN.
The partyís in DEZís room, I got the juice you bring the Gin!


St. Paddy's Day Rap 02/28/05

My friends have no fear,
green beer day is near!

Kawasaki riders unite!
For one day only your colors shine bright!

You used to have EBOZ,
But now he's with team red!

He's gonna corner that 999,
Like he's railing a bobsled.

To ride like these racers,
You need balls that are big.

To get them, just lay on your back,
And let our Hannah Sullivan do the Nut-JIG!!!


P.S. How did the Irish jig get started???
~Not enough restrooms are the local pubs! DOH!!!!!

Bionic DESMO Rap 01/17/05

Da DESMO wreckin' crew in full effect,
Wit da V deuce bass to put you in check.

Reppin' the 212 to the 201,
Our tricked out rides have got you on the run.

D to the E to the S M O,
We rockin' the streets like ya'll don't know!

Trix are for kids rockin the brain bucket lids,
Head down and knee draggin is what DESMO is!

Wit Termis and Mags our shits be bionic,
We'll smoke you so bad like you puffin the chronic!


Smack Talk Rap 08/31/04

My moto's tires are round and black.
One on the front and one on the back.
I ride real slow and talk only SMACK.

I'll smoke you on the street and on the track.
Your head will spin like your smoking crack.

My smack talk is good like you know it should.
If you want a little lesson just come to my hood.

I won't be riding though even if I could.
'Cause looking at my Ducati gives me major wood.

Little do you know that my bike is only for show
I trick out my bike and make sure you know

Exactly how much cash I'm willing to blow
For that reaction of everyone going WHOOOOW!

This is the stereotype that we've all heard
But the truth of the matter is that this ain't the word!

The DESMO crew rides and we ride real hard
Mostly on route but sometimes into the old lady's yard.

We've got in this club, characters galore.
We've Monkey Boy our DESMO track whore.

From D1 to D2, to smack talk legend Vu.
We also got racers like Ted and Turu!

There are also some strange creatures like The Seth
And a "friend of mine" Pinky, the hitman who'll put you to death!

Our DESMO ladies are badass and they truly rule.
Try keeping up and they'll take you to school.

We've got them young and we've got them old.
From young Kev to Old Fart Fred who truly broke the mold!

The DESMO godfather, Captain Gary Lee Gordon started this all.
With some help from the founders and members we're all having a ball.

DESMO is a family, first and foremost.
Raise up your can of redbull, to DESMO we toast!


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